Hasbro's Latest Sexist Shopping List

Hasbro's latest recommended toys.

For boys (the entire list):

TRANSFORMERS MOVIE FIGURES
BUMBLEBEE MOVIE VOICE MIXER HELMET
TRANSFORMERS MOVIE CONSTRUCTICON DEVASTATOR
G.I. JOE MOVIE 3-3/4-INCH MOVIE FIGURES
G.I. JOE MOVIE NIGHT RAVEN VEHICLE
G.I. JOE MOVIE ACCELERATOR SUIT DUKE
STAR WARS DUEL ACTION LIGHTSABER
STAR WARS CLONE TURBO TANK
WOLVERINE ELECTRONIC CLAW
MARVEL UNIVERSE 3-3/4-INCH ACTION FIGURES

For girls (the entire list):

MY LITTLE PONY PONYVILLE SWEETIE BELLE'S GUMBALL HOUSE
LITTLEST PET SHOP COZY CARE ADOPTION CENTER
FURREAL FRIENDS LULU, MY CUDDLIN’ KITTY
ZAMBI THE BABY ELEPHANT
STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE BERRY CAFE Playset

The 1950s are alive and well in America.

(source)

Name of the Game: Israeli Games Fair

Israel is gearing up for its first multi-game game convention.

What: Spearheaded by SmartZone, an Israeli importer and publisher, the Israeli Games Fair ("Name of the Game") is supposed to be modeled on the Essen fair.

When: It will be three days (three freakin' days!) long during Hol Hamoed Sukkot.

Where: In the Afula industrial area. Partial sponsorship by the Afula municipality.

See the site for more details.

What to Expect: Expect there to be a bunch of publishers exhibiting and selling games, as well as organized game activities.

Vendors: Current participants include SmartZone, FoxMind (publisher), SilverStars (Eurogame and RPG importer), Bubima (wooden games, puzzles, and toys), Kapla (wooden games, puzzles, and toys), ToySmart (publisher), and hopefully more. Notably absent is KodKod (they rarely do anything in Israel; either they don't care or they're too big to care) and Haim Shafir (I think he has a conflicting event).

Conflict: Hol Hamoed is a typical time to organize large scale events such as this. Unfortunately, that also means that other events that might attract the same or similar crowd will also be happening during this time. ICON (link is to the English site, but the Hebrew site has more info), the Sci-Fi and RPG convention, which also usually has a strong CCG and board game showing, will also take place over three days during Hol Hamoed in Tel Aviv. And I will also be hosting my usual bi-annual Games Day on one day during Hol Hamoed.

Smart Zone



Smart Zone is one of the few Israeli companies that are really trying. These guys really love games and puzzles and they're doing their best to make new and better ones, while still facing the reality of selling to a public that hasn't progressed past Ricuz (Hebrew Monopoly clone from the 1950s) and Backgammon.

The above Cobra Cubes is a representative puzzle/game in the genre that includes Rush Hour and Tangrams. It's by Ariel Laden, an Israeli designer. It's pretty elegant: just four cubes that you have to rearrange in a bunch of ways to fit 40 increasingly difficult puzzles (can't speak for the difficulty of any of them). They did a previous game, World Passport, which was also a simple and elegant game in this genre.

Yehuda

10 Stupid Must (Not) Buy Toys for Christmas

Lots of stores are jumping on the Christmas bandwagon already. In September. So I figure, why not me? I can be just as crass, commercial, and annoying as they can. So here's my list of must (not) buy toys for this Christmas (yeah, I'll give you a real list later).

It's easy to find joke and gag toys, or adult toys from novelty stores. That's no challenge. The trick is to find real toys that might actually fall into the hands of unsuspecting children.



1. Sweeney Todd: Razor Prop Replica - "Slice and dice with Sweeney Todd! Lifesize prop replica from the Oscar-winning film! Your friends will think you're really sharp when you flash this authentic prop replica of the singing barber's straight razor..."

This is made out of "real metal". Yes, a real (but dull, I hope) metal razor for your young'un, so he or she can pretend to be the demon barber who slashes throats.



2. OCD Obsessive Compulsive Action Figure - I'm guessing that this one is a joke, but I can't tell for certain. If it's a joke, I don't get it.



3. Trailer Trash Doll 12" in Collector's Box - See, this one I know is a joke. Only it's based on an old joke called "Trailer Park Barbie", which some company used as inspiration to make the actual doll.



4. AVENGING UNICORN PLAYSET - Feeling petulant, and don't have a voodoo doll lying around? This play set comes with a boss, a hippie, and a mime for impaling on your pretty play unicorn (with interchangeable horns).



5. Billy Bob Lil' Vampire Pacifier Headband Combo Pacifier - Dress up your baby with this hysterical pacifier that makes him look like a vampire. Comes with matching headband.

If this isn't weird enough, the same company sells buckteeth, piglet, and other pacifiers.



6. Pee & Poo Plush Dolls - Set - Supposedly a lighthearted set of dolls meant to prepare your child for potty training.



7. Giant Microbes The Clap - Gonorrhea (Neisseria gonorrhoeae) Venereals Plush - As long as we're on the subject of plush toys, who can resist this lovely plush gonorrhea doll? You certainly can't resist the real version!

You can also catch Chlamydia, Herpes, Syphilis, and lots of other great diseases. Trade them with your friends!



8. Good Bye Kitty! - Dead Pets: They'll Never Run Away - Completing our plush series, this fine plush dead roadkill cat, complete with tire tracks.



9. Dead Duck - Continuing with the dead animals theme, I suggest replacing a kid's real rubber duck with this one while they're not looking. Then tell them that they killed the duck. Yeah, they'll cry for a few hours, but deep down they'll think it's pretty funny.



10. Hog Wild Pro Thumb Wrestling - Changing gears, here's a candidate for dumbest toy ever invented. I'm wondering about the market research that went into this one. By the time you find it in the drawer, the match is over.



11. Super Soaker Oozinator Blaster - I believe this was featured once on The Daily Show, where Samantha Bee called it "Junior's first money shot".