Wednesday, May 11, 2005

A Discarded Bit of Humor I Can't Make Funnier and Have Gotten Bored of Playing With

We're here at the game collection of Yehuda Berlinger, the founder of the Jerusalem Strategy Gaming Club, or JSGC as he refers to it. It might interest the viewer to know that the JSGC also stands for (I'm not making this up):

Japanese Society of Gastroenterological Carcinogenesis
JavaScript Garbage Collector
Jain Society of Greater Cleveland
Jersey Shore Golf Club
Jill Stein for Governor Campaign
JeffSol Glycerine Carbonate
and John Shelley Garden Center

among others. The game collection is off the kitchen on a set of shelves. Sci-fi books take up the first two shelves, and games the next three. All in all, about 30 games are here. And here is our host, Yehuda


Hi. So, give us an overall picture.

Well, about 30 of these games are mine. About ten are borrowed, and about five of mine are leant out to other games groups or people.

What's your favorite?

Puerto Rico. What a game. Listen, just feel how fun this game is.

But I ...

No, just stand there and feel it. Go ahead. What do you feel?

I don't feel anything.

Well, yeah. But you would though, if we were playing, right? What a game. OK, look at this one, Goa. Great game. Great game. Perfect game. I mean, this game is so perfect.

Really, it's perfect?

Yeah, perfect, man. Beyond perfect. So perfect, it's almost all the way back to sucks. Noone ever wins this game. Yeah, we all play, and we all lose. Every time. In fact, each game we do worse. This game rocks.

Doesn't someone have to win?

Ah, no, no. No one wins. That's what's so great. I mean, we just open it up on the table. Bam. We lost. We don't even have to take the pieces out. Bam. We lost.

Wow, that is ... quick.

Yeah. Every time. I think next time we lose just thinking about it. Yeah, I'm not thinking about it. I'm scared to lose. Don't think about it. Don't think about it.

I'm not.

Yeah, you are. Stop thinking about it. You'll make us lose. Stop. Stop. All right, we've seen enough of that one. Let's move on. Let's move on. Oh, yeah. Die Maker. Yeah. What a game. You know this is "the" game. The game your parents didn't want you to play.


Yeah. Die, Maker! You kill the gods, man. You have to kill the gods.


Yeah, you take these, like knives and stuff, and you roll the die, and if you win, you just stab, man, cut out its throat. Argh!

Actually, "Die Macher" means "The Top Guys". It's a board game about the German elections.

[Pause] Well, yeah, of course, yeah, we never really played it, you know, we just heard about it. Nice bits, though.

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